enosynce is virtuous

Willie Lynch Effect Of Black Women

....discuss

Labels: ain't that interesting, black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 7/15/2008 01:50:00 PM 0 Comments

Too Much Booty In Tha Pants (Hottentot Venus and Khoikhoi)

Labels: ...black folks, ain't that interesting, checkitout, just google it, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 3/20/2008 01:57:00 PM 0 Comments

8 Hateful Things Women Do To Each Other...

8 Hateful Things Women Do To Each Other
by Norka Blackman-Richards / Circle Sister

It's become the silent emotional killer among women. Women who are downright mean, malicious and disrespectful with each other. This trend is creating havoc in our relationships with each other, for it strikes the core of sisterhood. Real sisterhood can only exist when respect and trust stand unshakeable. In this particular, most men are quite opposite to us. For a man, a brother is a brother. However, what is most disturbing about our malicious ways is that we are passing on a legacy of a broken sisterhood to our daughters. Girls that are mean and catty are usually this way because their understanding is that this is a normal part of femaleness. They grow up to become mean and catty women who perpetuate a diseased sisterhood. To break this cycle we each need to make a conscious effort to validate all women. Be they our friend! s or not. Otherwise, we will continue to find ourselves moving within circles of female hostility, suspicion, and pain. Here is my list of the most detestable practices that we need to discontinue in order to heal our sisterhood:

1. Talking about each other - You are really not her friend if what you have to say about her is so bad you can't say it in front of her. If you are a real friend you should be able to tell her your concerns for her life to her face. If you have the need to tell others, but you haven't found the time to tell her - red lights should be flashing. Believe it or not, gossiping is not an intrinsic part of being female. Women who gossip do it not because it's a woman-thing, but because they want to elevate themselves and put other women in a place of inferiority. Gossiping is just another symptom of deeper insecurities.

2. Fighting for men - One of the most undignified things that any wo! man can do is to fight, argue, or curse another woman over a man. It's a disgusting trend that used to be a school girl thing, but today adult women are doing it too. If both of you are in conflict - because his choice is not clear - then that means that he's really not into any of you. He's probably playing both of you. That man really does not deserve love or attention from either one of you. Let him go.

3. Joining female gangs - Women who make you feel unwelcome and unwanted within their circle of friends are not to be trusted. Women cliques have become common in the workplace, at church, in the neighborhood. Cliques are the dwelling place of insecure women. Women who join cliques are seeking refuge from their own lack of confidence by cocooning themselves within this circle of supposed exclusivity. Again, the need to belong to, or be part of a clique is also a sign of deeper insecurities. Beware, cliques are usually encouraged and thrive on a type of gang mentality.

4.Undermining each other - Beware of any woman who can never celebrate your accomplishments with you. It could be a new boyfriend, a promotion, an award, a new job, a new acquisition, weight loss. If she has nothing positive to say to you about it, does not show emotional support, or chooses to remain silent she is not a true friend. Real friends know how to recognize and genuinely rejoice for our successes with pride.

5. Competing against each other - You need to get this straight. There will always be another woman with nicer hair, a more caring husband or boyfriend, better behaved children, a better paying job, a bigger house, a more fashionable wardrobe - there will always be some woman with more of what you don't have. Consequently, the only person that you need to compete against is yourself. Strive to be the best that you can be - for you. Competing against other women to prove yourself superior is a fin! ancial and emotional drainer. Because of this mindless competition we become mean, envious and hypocritical. It is pointless

6. Disrespecting boundaries - To survive peacefully every relationship and every friendship must have clear boundaries. Good relationships operate within margins of respect. Within this level of respect, privacy and intimacy are keywords. Yes, you are my friend, but that doesn't give me the right to walk into your bedroom or your kitchen, unbeknownst to you, and help myself to your stuff. I don't do this not because you won't allow me to, but because I respect your privacy and your things. Consequently, we both need to know and respect each other's levels of privacy and intimacy.

7. Crossing boundaries - This is similar to the above; the only difference is that my respect of your boundaries should never depend on my friendship with you. We need to respect women for the simple fact that they are women. If she is a woman she is a sister. Period. Therefore! , from that understanding I will have the utmost respect for her children, her man, her opinions, her choices, and for her as a person. It amazes me how women are quick to disrespect another sister's boundaries, but feel offended if another woman does to them the same exact thing. Honestly, that type of inconsistent behavior can only be credited to some form of mental illness.

8. Exploiting our friendships - This is a major one. Why are you friends? Do you only remember her being around whenever she could get something from you? It doesn't even have to be material. It could just be your time or your positive energy. Does she happen to be always on the receiving side, with you dishing out ton loads of yourself or your stuff? Or is she your friend because of what you represent? It could be that your husband's position or yours, your possessions, your talent, whatever, represents some form of achievement. Is she a friend because that link ! to you places her on a higher platform? In a real friendship appreciat ion, support, and loyalty must be reciprocal.

Labels: social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 4/26/2007 11:15:00 AM 0 Comments

...Why do black women WANT to participate?

Are these models degrading themselves? When is it crossing the line? ?

[they said] :I read about how some (supposedly) black women complained about rap videos having only non-black or lightskinned (since when did that become non-black) women. Do you want your black ass in those nasty (so called, by some) degrading videos ? I mean really though is that something to complain about ? We should be happy. For several hundred years black women have been objectified (sexually) by non blacks. Then when things change we are pissed off. I don't feel the need to be equally represented in NEGATIVITY and DISRESPECT.It simply AMAZES me, when some Black women, light or dark, get upset that they don't get a chance to be represented in filth.I find it hypocritical to denounce the women of these videos and or the other hand you support the artists. I can't imagine why any self respecting, self loving woman would want to parade around in front of a camera or out in public for that matter, looking and acting like a slut. Granted there are some women who are just too stupid to realize that men who foam at the mouth at them are not into them or their minds, but their behinds. Woman and our young girls are being led to believe that in order to attract attention, they must get naked and act slutty. Carmen Elektra, and other Baywatch types have always been used to exploit the beauty of white women yet know ones points this out. Playboy...all these images appear readily on newsstands..yet the world says beautiful, sexy women..why are we the ones that say hoes, and what have you about our women?

[my opinion]:Should black women want to be in these videos? In the beginning, I don't think they were as degrading as they are today, so yes, I think black women had the desire to be represented as being beautifil in their own aesthetics and culture. I mean, I'm only 22, but I remember the Prince videos, and the Super Freak videos my older cousins used to watch. And all the women in them had the Eurocentric beauty look to them....no black women....no Afrocentric features at all (big lips, big booty, big breasts)...we even went as far as adding fake hair pieces to our heads, as "short hair" wasn't in back then. So yes, black women did have a desire to be represented IMO...then you have the flipside to it. Those "Baby Got Back" type videos came out, and there was not one black woman offended by this...at least not around my way (okay, maybe the butt pads were a tad bit over doing it, but the point is, BLACK women were seen as being beautiful for their butts and everything else. is)....we were like "FINALLY!"



...for example, the common prototype for the "most beautiful girl in the world" in the late 80's/early 90's


*on the soapbox*

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 1/24/2007 11:38:00 AM 0 Comments

Final Exam time...Black Women and rape

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 12/13/2006 01:51:00 PM 0 Comments

Death of the Black Woman -- an email

...got this in an email...decided to share

While struggling with the reality of being a human instead of a myth,
the strong black woman passed away. Medical sources say she died of
natural causes, but those who knew her know she died from being
silent when she should have been screaming, smiling when she should have been raging, from being sick and not wanting anyone to know because her pain might inconvenience them.

She died from an overdose of other people clinging to her when she
didn't even have energy for herself. She died from loving men who didn't love themselves and could only offer her a crippled reflection. She died from raising children alone.

She died from the lies her grandmother told her mother and her mother
told her about life, men & racism. She died from being sexually abused as a child and having to take that truth everywhere she went every day of her life, exchanging the humiliation for guilt.

She died from asphyxiation, coughing up blood from secrets she kept
trying to burn away instead of allowing herself the kind of nervous
breakdown she was entitled to, but only white girls could afford.

She died from being responsible, because she was the last rung on the
ladder and there was no one under her she could dump on.

She died from being a mother at 15 and a grandmother at 30 and an
ancestor at 45. She died from being dragged down and sat upon by
un-evolved women POSING as sisters and friends.

She died from tolerating Mr. Pitiful, just to have a man around the
house. She died from sacrificing herself for everybody and everything when what she really wanted to do was be a singer, a dancer, or some
magnificent other. She died from lies of omission because she didn't want to bring the black man down.

She died from tributes from her counterparts who should have been
matching her efforts instead of showering her with dead words and
empty songs. She died from myths that would not allow her to show weakness without being chastised by the lazy and hazy.

She died from hiding her real feelings until they became hard and
bitter enough to invade her womb and breasts like angry tumors.
She died from always lifting heavy groceries all by herself.

She died from never being enough of what men wanted, or being too
much for the men she wanted. She died from being too black and died again for not being black enough.

She died from being misinformed about her mind, her body & the extent
of her royal capabilities. She died from knees pressed too close together because respect was never part of the foreplay that was being shoved at her. She died from loneliness in birthing rooms and aloneness in abortion centers.



She died in bathrooms with her veins busting open with self-hatred
and neglect. And sometimes when she refused to die, when she just refused to give in she was killed by the lethal images of blonde hair, blue eyes and flat butts, being rejected by the OJ.'s, the Quincy's, the Cuba's & the Kobe's (just to name a few). Sometimes, she was stomped to death by racism & sexism, executed by hi-tech ignorance while she carried the family in her belly, the community on her head, and the race on her back!

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 6/26/2006 09:58:00 AM 1 Comments

"I wonder why we take from our women, why we rape our women, do we hate our women?

...food for thought

I think its time we kill for our women. To heal our women. Be real to our women. -- Tupac Shakur (Keep Your Head Up)

I get around. The underground just don't stop for Ho's. -- Tupac Shakur (I Get Around-Same CD)


Dear Black Woman: I know that you have suspected this for many years but now it's time to lay the cards on the table and keep it real.


I hate you.


I know that some of the "heavy" Brotha's say that you are the mother of civilization and every thang but they never taught me that in history class. They never taught me about Queen Nzinga and Candace and the old flix on cable have the queens of Egypt lookin' more like Elizabeth Taylor than Eartha Kitt. I never saw any movies about the original ride or die chick Harriet Tubman who was quick to pull a gat on any sucka that punked out and didn't want to roll with tha crew to the Promised Land. But I did see Butta Fly McQueen flossin' in front of Ms. Scarlett 'bout how she "didn't know nuthin' bout birthin' no babies." White folks call that joint a classic. Church wasn't much better as the only women I ever heard about were a white virgin named Mary and whispers about Sis. Ruth sleepin' with the pastor and half the deacon board.


So I hate you.


Now I ain't tryin' to get all deep and philosophical bout this thang cuz I know that peeps have dropped science about some sort of legacy of slavery and how the white man snatched African men from their women and children. How 100 pound Ol' massa Charlie would have his way with Sallie Mae while all 300 pound Big Buck could do was sit in the corner and cry like a little b....um baby. I've heard the old playa's from down south talk about how every Saturday night when they were out with a sweet lil honey, they ran the risk of having a bunch of good ol boyz snatch her up and throw her in the back of a pickup. So they say when I strike out at you I am really striking out at them and my inability to protect you from them. But that ain't true, I'm just following the pimp code laid down by Bishop Don Juan and them..."Always keep a Ho in her place..."


They tell me that there is some sort of conspiracy to destroy the Black family by givin' the sista's more job opportunities than the Brotha's. Some sort of two for one deal where they can satisfy racial quota requirements by hiring somebody who is both black and female before they hire me. So while you went out lookin' for work , every day I was at home eatin' Cheerios and playin' Play Station. That was until social services told you that you had to choose between me stayin' at your crib and keepin' the welfare check so you could feed my lil seed Tyree. So, I'm back home:a 30 year ol man still sleepin' on his mama's couch.


So I hate you.


Maybe I hate you cuz you hate yourself. This ain't the 60's with Sista's with Angela Davis afros throwin' up the Black fist and demanding RESPECT. This ain't even the Sista Power Hip Hop Era when Latifah was still tha queen and Yo Yo was down with the Intelligent Black Woman's Coalition. I mean Isis long done changed her name to Lin Que. We ain't seen Sista Soulja in a minute and Ms. Melody's been missing in action every since she and Kris got that divorce. I haven't heard a Sista speak what's on her mind in a while. But I do see Betty tha Body's booty on the videos every day. Not even sure if Sista's got a voice cuz in every video they are showin' her behind like it's got a mind of its own. But I watch anyway.


So when I flip the channel on the wide screen and hear about a bunch of white boys rapin' a Sista with a broomstick, I can't even get mad cuz my boy Shawn told how he put an extra C-note in Sexy Chocolate's thong at the Hypnotic Ho Club, last night so that she could do that thang she does with a Colt 45 bottle and some Skittles....


So I hate you.


I heard that some Brotha's and Sista's are calling May "Respect Black Women Month" and starting the R.O.S.E. (Respect Our Sisters Everywhere) movement. I heard that they are asking Hip Hop headz not to call Sista's tha "B" word this month and asking Brotha's to give a rose to any Sista whom they have disrespected...I probably won't participate, though. I can't be no hypocrite.


Like I was tellin' my anger management counselor last week, you know the one that the court assigned me to after I caught that case for slappin' Toneka on the corner of 5th and 3rd, last week? Anyway, he asked me if I hated my moms and I told him that I hated her every since that day when them boyz chased me home from school in the 3rd grade and I hoped that pops would come to the door to have my back but it was mama...Pops had skipped town again. Or that time when it was only mama who came to my graduation...Pops couldn't make it. He was locked up again. I never really liked too much of anything after that. Not even my own reflection in the mirror.


Maybe I hate you so much cuz I hate me.......



SOURCE

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 6/23/2006 01:41:00 PM 0 Comments

"She should've kept her mouth shut!"

...continuing on my rant on the silencing of the black woman, I shall recall a recent conversation I had with one of my friends. We were talking about films and movies, and got on the topic of the movie "Crash". Well, there's a scene in the movie involving Terrance Howard, so if you haven't seen the film yet, I suggest you stop reading now.
















last chance...



















okay. I'll introduce you to what I call a "selective-hypocrite". S/he wants you to take his/her opinions as the gospel, but only when it invovles him/her winning the harmless debate. The film left a lot of things nclear, which I thought was great about the film, becasue it dealt with social issues and seemed like its main goal was to ingite discussion on these issues...so here goes:

The movie is filled with all types of stereotypes by the way...Terrance Howard's character is a successful black man/movie director with Uncle Tom tendancies. One of Terrance's actor employees gets caught "talking white", and Terrance's boss commanded the dude to start "talking black" or else.

I'll explain another scene...there's a racist white cop in the film, who just got a call on a stolen vehicle. Terrance and his wife are in an expensive SUV, leaving some sort of formal dinner-type thing I guess. Terrance's wife has on a nice dress, and Terrance is dressed professionally. Observably, the wife has had one too many cocktails, and is in the car babbling over nothing in the passenger seat. Coincidentally, the racist white cop sees Terrance ride by, and he snaps on his sirens (even though Terrance's car doesn't match the profile of the stolen car in the least bit). Terrance is cool about it...he pulls over...keeps his hands on the steering wheel. Racist cop peeks in...saw the wife on Terrances lap. Terrance asks what the problem is, and the cop came back with some smart aleck remark...asks Terrance where his insurance and stuff is. Terrance has it, and procedes to explain the situation...racist cop aint hearing it. Tells Terrance to step out of the car.

At this point, Terrance is visably pissed, kinda laughs it off a little bit, but does as he is told. The wife, also pissed, rolls her eyes...tells the cop that they had no justifyable cause to pull them over. The cops partner is now searching Terrance...has him all hemmed up on the police car. Humiliating the man basically. The wife asks the cops again, why did they pull them over? Terrance yells for the wife to shut up...that everything will be ok...that he'll handle it. The wife rolls her eyes...mumbles under her breath. The 2nd cop yells that Terrance doesn't have anything on him. Racist cop yanks Terrance's wife out of the car...kinda man handles her a bit, and slams her againt the car. Racist cop then procededs to sexually assault the wife...he sticks his hands up her dress and everything; in front of the other cop and Terrance. Racist cop threatens to throw them in jail on a few bullshit charges, and Terrance ends up apologizing, and begging the cop to let him and his wife be on their way. Later on, the wife is pissed at Terrance's "lack" of manhood...and concludes that Terrance should have done something more to "protect" the wife.

...now according to some, Terrance could've handled the situation perfectly if his wife would have kept her mouth shut like he suggested. In conclusion, because wifey ran her mouth, its her own fault, and she has no one to blame but herself. It is also suggested that the problem with black men/women social issues stem from the premise that black women need to "learn their place"...and that marriages will continue to result in divorce unless we do so.

...my take...a) the outcome would have possibly been different had the wife kept running her mouth...afterall, she was drunk, but in no way does this take away from her behavior. I beleive that if she was 100% sober...she still would've mouthed off to the cop....b)Since when does sexual assault become part of the job description of the police?...I'm pretty sure she was gonna sue their asses...and c)..really, people with the mindstate of the previous paragraph are obviously insecure (at least, that's how they're coming off to me)....they're also not taking into account all factors assocated with so-called "independent women".....they've intimidated by them on the notion that black women benefit the most from Affirmatiive Action issues, so we really have nothing to complain...

...uh...excuse me?

...watch the move "Dirty" with Cuba Gooding too...you'll get my drift

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 6/01/2006 09:27:00 AM 0 Comments

~Gagging Blacky

...basically, black women have been silenced with regards to issues in the black community. If you disagree, that just reaffirms my thesis of the silencing of the Black Woman. We need to speak the hell up! I'll espound for a few...:

~During the Civil Rights Movement, black Women's rights were often placed on the back burner (beneficiary: the black man)

~During the Women's Suffrage Movement, BLACK women's rights were often placed on the back burner (beneficiary: the white woman)

Issues from current research (i'm guilty of ignoring a few of these myself): Domestic Abuse, Rape, (we don't speak up or report these issues enough; therefore neglecting the issue altogether) Kidnapping, Murder (whether you know it or not...there are tons of missing black women/children...we don't get that much media coverage), STD's and other infections, Teen pregnancy (awareness on such issues should be raised and dealt with)

...I'm working on a poem on this aspect too....stay tuned!

{research in progress...}

Labels: ain't that interesting, black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 5/30/2006 10:35:00 AM 0 Comments

Sagging Tiddies -- "I need a ride or die chick" -- We're own our own on this one ladies

[ok, i'm back]

...support (hence the sagging tiddie reference) for black women's issues lies within black women, for the most part. Unfortunately, we've been divided, and thus, a hatred now exists between the light sista and dark sista. Critiquing issues with Cocoacentric thought proves to be beneficial; however, because of the hate that exists amongst us, it is difficult in getting the flipside from a lightskinned perspective. You may be thinking by now that all these dividing concepts will not do any good, which I don't deny, however, they are relevant in MY hypothesis. Its not that hard to form your own by the way.

There needs to be a revolution. There needs to be a global sorority existing amongst us. Only after this occurs, will the black woman advance in society. Yes, I am fed up with this shit....yes, we need the black man to become our "BRAS"..to support us on some shit. Yes, I think black men are scared to support us (closeted feminists),...yes we've been on the back burner for too fucking long and its time to focus on some of OUR shit...or at least focus on man/woman issues collectively. We have a history of supporting racial issues, how 'bout some fucking support with gender issues?


[on the soap box]

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 5/03/2006 11:42:00 AM 0 Comments

The Color Complex -- "Ya'know it's hard out here for a Colored Girl"

"Cocoacentricity"

...a scholar by the name of Molefi Asante came up with this concept of "Afrocentricity", which is basically looking at things from the point of view of blacks--not necessarily with a superiority complex either. So, I kinda borrowed this idea, and introduced "Cocoacentricity", which is the critique of black issues from the point of view of a dark-skinned sista since we always get left out....feel me?

...aiight so...for observational purposes, i'm investigating why certian stereotypes exist amongst us...as well as testimonials, and personal anectodes. For example...:

~Patriarcial Nation: The Definition of Beauty

~Chocolate girls are loud & ghetto....light skinned girls are prissy ...(Martin's "shananay character"...Jamie Foxx's character, etc)

~Chocolate girls are independent....light-skinned girls are gold-diggers...
(light girls are favored and spoiled....dark girls are forced to fend for themselves, etc)

~Over-confidence vs. Low Self Esteem...which is worse?

~Dying to be represented: The mistake of the video ho

...and other topics and issues that happen to make their way to my little notebook.




[i'll be back]

Labels: b, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 5/03/2006 11:04:00 AM 0 Comments

Black Women and Social Issues -- A hypothesis

...there are several issues that must be addressed within Black Community> It is my belief that the initiation of a process of liberation (holistically for blacks), therefore, must begin with male/female relationships and the start of the black woman recognizing her strength and power; ultimately eradicating the underlying racism, sexism, marxism, and all other "-isms" that is bestowed upon her. I will present a small hypothesis (warning: ALL MY OPINION). This particular blog serves as a precendent for a comprehensive essay/paper due pretty soon. Don't let my sacrasm offend you. Am I a male basher? feminist? womanist? just runnin my damn mouth? *shrugs*....you decide.





"...and as God created external emblems of love, she birthed many kingdoms thereafter" -- Anonymous


"Oshun", pictured above, is a Yoruba (African) Goddess of love, sensuality, and tranqulity. She is most often depicted as a dark-skinned bodacious woman with exposed breasts, cowrie shells, feathers or fans, jewls, and reflectors as a river was named after her in Nigeria. Basically, the story is: she was left out of a meeting with her brothers because they failed to see her strength. Her father appointed her to multiply the human race, and sentenced her brothers and their descendants to an eternity of asking Oshun for forgiveness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Agenda Issues (All termed by me :-D)

~The Color Complex -- "Ya'know it's hard out here for a Colored Girl"
~Sagging Tiddies -- "I need a ride or die chick" -- We're own our own on this one ladies
~Socialistics -- "I thought you didn't need a man?: It's Susan's fault."
~Gagging Blacky -- "We'll handle that girly shit later. Vote Jesse!"

Labels: black folks, social issues, women

posted by ~Kesh @ 4/19/2006 01:41:00 PM 0 Comments